An Advent Winter's Night

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/marylea/11454432756/in/photolist-isbXMW-isfjGp-isfzqG-isfCF9-isgf6M-isgfJk-ishgEQ-mTvkPu-nVhR4n-nVjaE8-nVkbUS-nVkT7q-nVkZp5-nVm3Af-nVmq1g-oaNowC-ocFNA9-ocMJNZ-ocMLt2-oeBCYi-4bFjcc-4bFjcn-4bFoDX-4bFTQ9-4bFTQJ-492db4-492dbc-492dbn-49hcwZ-49hcxx-49jEz6-4a6obP-4a6obV-4a6obX-4a6oca-4a6AsP-4a6AsV-4a6At2-4a6At8-4a6Atn-4aaNUW-4aaNV9-4aaNVf-4aaNVq-4aaNVC-4aaNVJ-4ab33Q-4ab33Y-4ab345-4ab34b" title="St. Joseph&#x27;s Catholic Church"><img src="https://live.staticflickr.com/2875/11454432756_1e7f45575a_h.jpg" width="1066" height="1600" alt="St. Joseph&#x27;s Catholic Church"/></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

Driving home the other night around 9:30 or 10pm. The snow had started up again and was falling quickly. It was one of those times when your bright lights illuminate so many snowflakes that you're better off just using your regular beams. The rural roads are amazingly quiet and if you take your time, it's not too treacherous. I watched for deer along the road's edge but didn't see any. There weren't many other drivers out at that time. Most drivers had probably made it home much earlier and why would you go out after dark when it was cold and snowing??

Yes. Why?

Well, I found a reason. As I was starting through our small town, I decided to take some side streets and drive by St. Joseph's Catholic Church, just to see it lit up at night with all that snow! St. Joseph's was built just after the Civil War to serve the Catholic community here. Their original church had been destroyed in a fire on another site further west of town, and so the parish came together to build this beautiful one to replace it. It's an historical building now, symmetrical in its architecture with a warm, intimate feel. Its interior is too small for the size of its current parish, so they have built a newer church north of town that is much larger and is used for most of their worship services. This smaller church is still used for weekday Masses.

The other night, I parked along the side of the road and got out of the car to walk in front of the church. How still the evening was! Not a sound to break my thoughts, nor a person to interrupt my time travel as I considered those original parishioners, and all who have followed since, gathering in Decembers long past to wait and pray, and then to celebrate at Christmas the birth of the One who fulfilled their many hopes. Just as we do today.


This photo doesn't quite capture how thickly the snow was falling, or just how strikingly inspiring this tall steeple was as I looked up at it from the street below. It was worth the chill in my hands and the damp in my hair just to be standing there as a witness of this moment caught by my camera lens in 2013.

Photos from December 16, 2013.

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/marylea/11455088415/in/photolist-isbXMW-isfjGp-isfzqG-isfCF9-isgf6M-isgfJk-ishgEQ-mTvkPu-nVhR4n-nVjaE8-nVkbUS-nVkT7q-nVkZp5-nVm3Af-nVmq1g-oaNowC-ocFNA9-ocMJNZ-ocMLt2-oeBCYi-4bFjcc-4bFjcn-4bFoDX-4bFTQ9-4bFTQJ-492db4-492dbc-492dbn-49hcwZ-49hcxx-49jEz6-4a6obP-4a6obV-4a6obX-4a6oca-4a6AsP-4a6AsV-4a6At2-4a6At8-4a6Atn-4aaNUW-4aaNV9-4aaNVf-4aaNVq-4aaNVC-4aaNVJ-4ab33Q-4ab33Y-4ab345-4ab34b/" title="The Steeple of St. Joseph&#x27;s Catholic Church"><img src="https://live.staticflickr.com/3760/11455088415_33057a3af2_h.jpg" width="1149" height="1600" alt="The Steeple of St. Joseph&#x27;s Catholic Church"/></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

[url=https://flic.kr/p/isfzqG][img]https://live.staticflickr.com/3719/11455137964_9669ca843e_b.jpg[/img][/url][url=https://flic.kr/p/isfzqG]Winter Light: St. Joseph's Catholic Church[/url] by [url=https://www.flickr.com/photos/marylea/]Mary Lea McNulty[/url], on Flickr

Gladiolus

For Jack. I really enjoyed our conversations. Be at peace.

Winter Pastimes: Dreaming of Summer Days!

Here he is again. My good dog. This was taken last June. Now, in the middle of the cold, grey days of January, we are dreaming of the warm weather that is soon to return. Just on the verge of February, the longest month in Michigan by my reckoning, the thought of summer days and warm, out door wanderings, is a pleasant thought indeed.

Winter Snow!

This picture is from last year but it looks pretty much the same today only with more snow. We've really had a punishing snowfall over the last several days, and today I was stuck in the driveway and it took about 3 hours to get it cleared. Even then it's only one lane wide and the road at the end isn't great. We get a lot of drifting in these parts and it's not a bad day to stay home. There's much to be done before the holiday, but of course much of it requires going out. No worries, though.

Cleaning up at home is good therapy for me and I have gotten a few things done that have waited for my attention for months. Boxes moved from the hallway, that sort of thing.

I'm over my previous melancholy about my mother that hits me now and then. When it's daylight, I am always more forward thinking.

The passage of time, though... That's something to ponder. We are born, we live, we die. We accomplish, we give. I hope we reflect. The quiet of reflection, of prayer, gives needed direction to our activity. It's a good thing. Snow days can slow us down, divert us a bit. Just staying warm is enough.

Into this darkness, our darkness, came the One who would make all things new. Advent is a time to consider how much we needed this One. How much we need Him still.

Missing You

I miss you. I don't understand myself sometimes, and I think that you would. You might be able to shed light on why I feel sad, why I feel lonely. There is a hole where you once were, where I felt known. Who knew it would still be there 33 years later? But here it is. At times I feel so needy, which isn't like me because I really am quite independent. But I always come back to you, to needing you. And then I feel badly that I didn't have more time, and that I didn't know what it must have been like for you. Now I can understand a little better, but then?... then I was still full of my own thoughts and while I thought I understood, I probably didn't understand at all. I'm sorry that I wasn't more help to you. I'm sorry that I was so wrapped up in my own life and friends and that I probably didn't say the things you wanted to hear from me at the time. I know I wish I could talk to you now. I wish I could hear you speak to me, and I wonder what you would say. I really wish I could have known what you think of me. I guess it's a good thing that I paid attention to how you did things. I probably didn't know why you did them, but at least I know some of the things you thought were important to do. Can you send me a little "hello" from somewhere, if you get a chance? Could you pop me a little post card to let me know that you're ok? That I'm ok?

It's cold outside, and dark because it's December. I miss you in December. You did a good job of making December a great time of year. I don't do nearly as well as you at making things special. In fact, I sometimes find it hard to move at all at this time of year. You'd think that because you set a good example for me, I'd be able to throw myself into this time of year with zeal. It's harder than you might think. But I don't want to make excuses. I don't know if a bowl of pine cones on the mantle would make my kids feel any better, but somehow it made me feel good when I was young.

Well, I have work to do here. But I miss you and really wish I could have talked to you today. I wonder sometimes if you ever felt like this. I suspect you must have, but you seemed to do ok.

Remember how I used to like to take pictures when I was young and dad would take my film to the store to be developed?? Well, I take pictures, now, too. These digital cameras are great! Anyway, this is a picture of an icy Queen Anne's Lace bloom. There's a field behind our home and I took this on a really cold day last winter. It sort of captures how I feel today. Maybe you know what I mean.

Thinking of you...

A Walk in the Woods

We are currently blanketed in snow, with gray skies overhead. The winter is only fresh upon us, but I am already dreaming of green grasses and warm breezes. I philosophically tell myself that the winter months are good for the soul, and that they create a desire for something greater. They reveal our vulnerability, our need for shelter and protection. They put me in touch with myself; I become more introspective and I see my faults and weaknesses more clearly. Life becomes more difficult, more challenging.

Spring and summer are full of possibilities and promise. They are months of confidence and life is easy (easier).

In the late summer we took a walk through a park which is a good thing to do. It was early morning in this case, but early or later in the evening are also beautiful times for getting out in the natural world. The pine forest filters the light and the needles make the path quiet. It is like a conversation with God. Stripped of the man-made distractions of daily life, it is healing to be alone in the woods. The mind is emptied of the build-up of worldly concerns, and our vision becomes clear.

I recently had the opportunity to see a movie, "The Human Experience". It has given me so much to think about. There are a number of excellent quotes peppered into the story line, but I had to look one of them up when I got home because it was so true, and so worth considering.

Martin Luther King had many profound and challenging things to say about the way we live. Here's a thought for now:

"We must rapidly begin to shift from a thing-oriented society to a person-oriented society. When machines and computers, profit motives and property rights are considered more important than people, the giant triplets of racism, materialism, and militarism are incapable of being conquered."

- Martin Luther King Jr.

Transformed

Shortly after the New Year, we had some snow. It provided opportunities for shoveling, and many scenic views. The rural midwest is familiar and comforting to me. It's charm speaks of hard work and character, old-fashioned qualities that never go out of style. This farm was dressed in snow.

Spring!

Today I am remembering spring.... and all the hope and joy I felt as the earth sprang to life all around me. I found this image on one of my photo CDs, taken May 1, 2006, just over six months ago. Half way through the year again, and we are seeing the end of the growing season. Instead all around us in the northern hemisphere is the coming of dormancy. The body is fading, dying perhaps, but the spirit, the real life is only sleeping. It is an opportunity for more reflection.

"Whoever seeks to preserve his life will lose it, but whoever loses it will save it."

Luke 17 (from the daily readings for today)

I wish you all a lovely Thanksgiving.