Lenten Journey

"Come away by yourselves to a quiet place, and rest." (Mark 6:31)

Forty days are provided to us in the liturgical year to withdraw a short distance into the quiet and reflect on our dependence on God and His providence, and to turn away from distractions that fill our lives with things that are superficial.  This reflection teaches us about our smallness and the importance of doing good to others.

God bless you. God bless us. God be with all who seek him with a pure heart, who seek to do good.

We are not enemies of one another

Beautiful churches are found in many places. Different styles and materials may be brought together in different ways. Their outward appearance is often inspiring, but we know that the real treasure is the God that inhabits our worship, and the individuals the churches are designed to inspire. The architecture and the artwork contained within them are meant to teach, to convey spiritual truths, to promote meaningful reflection, and to elevate our minds to higher thoughts.

We visited San Antonio eight years ago, and Mission San José, which is nearby. It is one of the old Catholic Missions in the area. These photos are of the door to the church. I liked its detailed wood carving, and the rose in the center. 

There may be things that separate us, but our Faith should always bring us together, no matter who we are. We are not enemies of one another, but rather pilgrims together, all on a journey. We ought to help one another in kindness and truth.

"We are commanded to have only one enemy, the devil. With him never be reconciled! But with a brother, never be at enmity in thy heart." -St. John Chrysostom.

May we reach out to one another today.

An Advent Winter's Night

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/marylea/11454432756/in/photolist-isbXMW-isfjGp-isfzqG-isfCF9-isgf6M-isgfJk-ishgEQ-mTvkPu-nVhR4n-nVjaE8-nVkbUS-nVkT7q-nVkZp5-nVm3Af-nVmq1g-oaNowC-ocFNA9-ocMJNZ-ocMLt2-oeBCYi-4bFjcc-4bFjcn-4bFoDX-4bFTQ9-4bFTQJ-492db4-492dbc-492dbn-49hcwZ-49hcxx-49jEz6-4a6obP-4a6obV-4a6obX-4a6oca-4a6AsP-4a6AsV-4a6At2-4a6At8-4a6Atn-4aaNUW-4aaNV9-4aaNVf-4aaNVq-4aaNVC-4aaNVJ-4ab33Q-4ab33Y-4ab345-4ab34b" title="St. Joseph&#x27;s Catholic Church"><img src="https://live.staticflickr.com/2875/11454432756_1e7f45575a_h.jpg" width="1066" height="1600" alt="St. Joseph&#x27;s Catholic Church"/></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

Driving home the other night around 9:30 or 10pm. The snow had started up again and was falling quickly. It was one of those times when your bright lights illuminate so many snowflakes that you're better off just using your regular beams. The rural roads are amazingly quiet and if you take your time, it's not too treacherous. I watched for deer along the road's edge but didn't see any. There weren't many other drivers out at that time. Most drivers had probably made it home much earlier and why would you go out after dark when it was cold and snowing??

Yes. Why?

Well, I found a reason. As I was starting through our small town, I decided to take some side streets and drive by St. Joseph's Catholic Church, just to see it lit up at night with all that snow! St. Joseph's was built just after the Civil War to serve the Catholic community here. Their original church had been destroyed in a fire on another site further west of town, and so the parish came together to build this beautiful one to replace it. It's an historical building now, symmetrical in its architecture with a warm, intimate feel. Its interior is too small for the size of its current parish, so they have built a newer church north of town that is much larger and is used for most of their worship services. This smaller church is still used for weekday Masses.

The other night, I parked along the side of the road and got out of the car to walk in front of the church. How still the evening was! Not a sound to break my thoughts, nor a person to interrupt my time travel as I considered those original parishioners, and all who have followed since, gathering in Decembers long past to wait and pray, and then to celebrate at Christmas the birth of the One who fulfilled their many hopes. Just as we do today.


This photo doesn't quite capture how thickly the snow was falling, or just how strikingly inspiring this tall steeple was as I looked up at it from the street below. It was worth the chill in my hands and the damp in my hair just to be standing there as a witness of this moment caught by my camera lens in 2013.

Photos from December 16, 2013.

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/marylea/11455088415/in/photolist-isbXMW-isfjGp-isfzqG-isfCF9-isgf6M-isgfJk-ishgEQ-mTvkPu-nVhR4n-nVjaE8-nVkbUS-nVkT7q-nVkZp5-nVm3Af-nVmq1g-oaNowC-ocFNA9-ocMJNZ-ocMLt2-oeBCYi-4bFjcc-4bFjcn-4bFoDX-4bFTQ9-4bFTQJ-492db4-492dbc-492dbn-49hcwZ-49hcxx-49jEz6-4a6obP-4a6obV-4a6obX-4a6oca-4a6AsP-4a6AsV-4a6At2-4a6At8-4a6Atn-4aaNUW-4aaNV9-4aaNVf-4aaNVq-4aaNVC-4aaNVJ-4ab33Q-4ab33Y-4ab345-4ab34b/" title="The Steeple of St. Joseph&#x27;s Catholic Church"><img src="https://live.staticflickr.com/3760/11455088415_33057a3af2_h.jpg" width="1149" height="1600" alt="The Steeple of St. Joseph&#x27;s Catholic Church"/></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

[url=https://flic.kr/p/isfzqG][img]https://live.staticflickr.com/3719/11455137964_9669ca843e_b.jpg[/img][/url][url=https://flic.kr/p/isfzqG]Winter Light: St. Joseph's Catholic Church[/url] by [url=https://www.flickr.com/photos/marylea/]Mary Lea McNulty[/url], on Flickr

Good-bye, My Brother

We awoke to frost on the fields on September 14, 2013, and a chilly 34 degrees (that's Fahrenheit), which was a bit of a shock after temps topping the 90s just a few days earlier.

My brother had passed away the afternoon before, on September 13. It was a rather sudden death and the reality of it was only beginning to sink in, so life was moving in slow motion for me on the following morning, despite the fact that I rose early. The world seemed changed in many ways, and yet remained so constant and sure.

On that morning, I peered into the slowly rising mist that obscured the distant landscapes, and I thought I may have just caught a glimmer of him there, peering back at me. Such a thin veil separates us. 

The low light of the early rising sun turned the dewy field grasses at my feet into shimmery chandeliers. There was no breeze.  A lone sand crane flew overhead and disappeared into the distant sky. I stood in that quiet space and just stared… those small lights at my feet, reminding me that His word is a lamp to my feet, a light to be trusted. 

And then surprisingly quickly, the mist rose up and was gone, and it was just blue skies.

We, all of us, cope and grieve in various ways. That morning, and those fields spoke to me. I am so blessed to live where the play of weather in nature can speak, and I can hear so many lessons there, and find comfort in that quiet space. I take photos to remind me of the very goodness that surrounds me. My God lovingly speaks to me in language I understand.  He uses so many ways to reveal Himself to me...  not always the same ways, but always the same loving God.

This morning, on September 14, 2013, He was speaking clearly and my grieving heart was comforted just a little. 

We live, we love, we pass on. Our Faith sustains us.

May it be well with you today.

Animals and God's Other Creatures

When I saw they were in the pasture, I called out to them a friendly, "Helloooow...!" There were three horses and two  donkeys. They turned to look at me and then came over to see me better. The first donkey eyed me curiously and turned away. He disappeared back toward the barn but returned moments later with his buddy. Those two are like twins, and they move and stand together in the most amusing fashion. I just love seeing all of these animals.

The animal world fascinates most of us as we explore the personalities and intelligence of the diverse creatures with whom we share our planet. I think of us as interconnected, all here with a different role to play, but yet all with the same purpose: to reflect the qualities of the Creator, by using our intellect and insights to good purpose.

The animal world is full and varied from the simplest single celled forms to the more complex creatures, with a range of qualities and personalities as diverse in between!

The invisible world is said to be the same, populated by intelligent creatures, angels and spiritual beings, of many bearings and features, with intelligence and purpose of their own. This may sound fantastical, of course. I recall a time in my life when the thought of angels and invisible creatures posed a real stumbling block to me. But it seems quite an acceptable construct to me now, and more acceptable as I peered back at these magnificent animals on the this past January morning.

I have already concluded that my dog is smart, with his own unique feelings, and affectionate qualities I regard as good. So you could say that my interactions with the animals around me have added substance to my faith in that mysterious world that can't be seen with the naked eye. It is not so difficult to understand that the created world has levels of intelligence in both the visible and invisible world, and that which I see is a reflection and lesson about the very large portion of Creation that I cannot see.

Whatever your own conclusions, aren't these horses and donkeys neat?

Photo from January 28, 2013.

Song of Simeon

At nighttime, I often sing the Song of Simeon in my head... A prayer of hope fulfilled and of faith.

"Now Lord, you can let your servant go in peace, according to your word. For my eyes have seen your saving deed, which you have set before all men: a light for revelation to the Gentiles, and for glory to your people Israel."

The Good Shepherd

The "Good Shepherd" magnolia.

We have a loving Father who cares about us, who cares for us.

Having heard and read about the Gosnell trial and the atrocious details, and seeing the report on the news last night as a jury deliberates this case, I am wondering how we can continue to deny that there is something wrong in our national thinking about the abortion issue. Like so many, I am wondering how this case will be determined and what it reveals about the American psyche.

Here, in this photo, behind the magnolias, is a depiction of the Resurrected Christ. Christ, who is our Good Shepherd, who seeks out the lamb who is lost, who has strayed. Sometimes we know we are lost or have wandered, and other times we are oblivious. This seems to be our current condition. I have no doubt that many who support abortion, do so with good intentions. However, an act that is inherently in error, cannot be correct, whatever the end may be. Abortion is not a solution, and can never be seen that way.

Our Creative Father can help bring good from our mistakes, though. Even the most egregious. This is my hope, and my prayer.

I took this photo last night on my way home from work. The St. Thomas the Apostle Catholic Church magnolia is probably the biggest one in the area. It's certainly one of the most beautiful.

photos from May 3,  2013.

Birthday, 2013 Litany

I slept in this morning to catch up a little after working a long stretch of days. I feel so much better with the extra sleep!!

The sun is shining and the temperature warming up this morning, my birthday. A gift for certain! How blessed I am!

Here is my 2013 Litany:

Today, I am grateful for so many gifts.

I am grateful for life, for my parents and family and all the instruction I received from them as I grew up, and for the earliest sense of identity and belonging they gave me.

I am grateful for the influence of the Catholic Church in my early years, for the sacraments of Batpism, Penance and Communion, all before I was 7 years old, and Confirmation a few years later! I loved that I could slip away on my bike and go to our church during the summer to sit quietly by myself in that holy place and pray.

I am grateful for the friends I had in elementary school and for the acceptance I experienced in their company. I am grateful for having a "best" friend in those early years, and for shared secrets and adventures, and a neighborhood "gang" with whom we explored the world! Our "gang's"adventures rivaled any of those in The Little Rascals! (Younger people may need to look up the reference.)

I am grateful for the move our family made to another town, even though it was painful at the time, and for the new friends I made in middle school and high school-- friends that are dear to me now.

I'm grateful for Young Life, and the encouragement I received to read scripture and to pray together with my peers. I am grateful for the awkwardness I felt in high school, which reminds me how awkward we often still feel as adults, and helps me find empathy. I'm grateful for my high school teachers. And I'm grateful for the difficulties and confusion I experienced during those years, for they brought lessons and insights that are with me still.

I'm grateful that my fellow classmates were spared going to the Vietnam War, although the young men had draft numbers, and some were nearly called. I'm grateful that the Vietnam War taught us to honor our young military people who continue to make sacrifices for our country because they are asked to do so, and not because they understand all the political and national interests that motivate our leaders.

I'm grateful for the gift of becoming a mother, three times! I'm grateful for the chance to learn that I could love someone else so deeply that my own life would seem unimportant in comparison I am grateful for the chance I had to hold young babies in my arms for hours, and to reassure them over and over again that they were loved no matter what, and then, over years, to confirm that no matter what our circumstances, we would always be for one another. I am grateful that I could teach my children, and thereby teach myself, what is important in life. And I am grateful to have lived to see my children's children. So grateful.

I am grateful for the humility I have learned through my mistakes and the consequences we must accept for our actions.

I am grateful for the love of my husband and his blindness to my faults.

I am grateful for my good health, not something to be taken for granted.

I am grateful for meaningful work and for having everything I need.

I am grateful that we live in a country that values independence and freedom, and that so many of my fellow citizens are trying to work together to preserve the lives and God-given rights of all persons, regardless of age, race, or religion, and to ensure that our homeland is secure from lawless acts no matter how great or small.

I am grateful for the years I have lived and the ones I may have left to live. I am grateful to you, and all that makes you who you are.

I feel so blessed, like a tree, planted by streams of water, that yields its fruit in due season.

As you can see, I already have all the gifts I could ever need or want. Today, I am simply grateful.

(photos from April 20, 2013, iPhone)

Take Heed

In the agricultural world, harvest is a time of reaping, and a good harvest is often the sign of good planning and hard work. The same holds true in other industries, too. Success is often the result of our good efforts and hard work, and certainly comes very little to those who do not make an effort. We know that we must work if we want results. But it is not a good idea to take all the credit, or assume that we control our fate. We know that circumstances must fall into place to make our efforts worthwhile. We know that "luck" often plays a big role in the process.

When things are going well, it is easy to rely on our own judgement and to accept that our good fortune is the result of our own cleverness. When we face difficulty, we are more apt to cry out for assistance. But it is so important in times of prosperity to remain humble and accept our circumstances as the result of God's providence and mercy. So much of life is hidden from us. To remain faithful in our trust, no matter if we abase or abound, is the key to calm and peace.

We are exhorted to remember and be grateful through the words of Moses:

"Take heed, lest you forget the Lord your God by not keeping his ordinances and statutes...
lest, when you have eaten and are full, and have built excellent houses and live in them, and when your herds and flocks multiply and your silver and gold is multiplied, and all that you have is multiplied, then your heart be lifted up and you forget the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage, who led you through the great and terrible wilderness, with its fiery serpents and scorpions and thirsty ground when there was not water, who brought you water out of the flinty rock, who fed you in the wilderness with manna which your fathers did not know, that he might humble you and test you, to do you good in the end. Beware, lest you say in your heart, 'My power and the might of my hand has gotten me this wealth.' You shall remember the Lord your God for it is he who gives you power to get wealth; that he may confirm his covenant which he swore to your fathers, as at this day."

-Deuteronomy 8:11-18

Good Friday

We are in the midst of the three days of celebration and reflection leading up to Easter Sunday. They are my favorite time year, and the most significant, for me, in the Christian calendar. They capture the heart of Christ's message of humility and obedience, which Jesus demonstrated perfectly. In how many other religious, political, or other traditions does the leader, (in this case, the Son of God) take on the role and duties of the servant? Jesus, whose entire mission was to reveal more of the Father to us, takes on the guilt of all of us, and becomes the perfect sacrifice. His sacrifice replaced the annual Jewish sacrifices at Passover, where the unblemished yearling lamb or goat was offered for the sins of the household. That first Passover was a bloody affair. All that killing and blood... it's disturbing to me to read the account and imagine the scene. Jesus fulfilled, completed that offering, and became the perpetual sacrifice, the perfect, unblemished offering. Crude and bloody, barbaric really, his crucifixion, his death, was the price of our freedom.

It wasn't easy for Him to bear it, but it was the Father's will.

"In the days when Christ was in the flesh, he offered prayers and supplications with loud cries and tears to the one who was able to save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverence. Son though he was, he learned obedience from what he suffered; and when he was made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation for all who obey him." Heb 5:7-9

He sets the example for us when it comes to obedience. We are to obey as He obeyed, so that the Father's will be done.

The Servant's Song:

Brother let me be your servant
Let me be as Christ to you
Pray that I might have the grace to
Let you be my servant, too.

We are pilgrims on a journey
We are travelers on the road
We are here to help each other
Walk the mile and bear the load.

I will hold the Christ light for you
In the night-time of your fear
I will hold my hand out to you
Speak the peace you long to hear.

I will weep when you are weeping
When you laugh I'll laugh with you
I will share your joy and sorrow
Till we see this journey through.

When we sing to God in heaven
We shall find such harmony
Borne of all we've known together
Of Christ's love and agony.

Brother let me be your servant
Let me be as Christ to you
Pray that I might have the grace to
Let you be my servant, too.

There are a variety of versions of this hymn on YouTube. I prefer a quieter version but couldn't find it. This one is nice.

In Honor of Saint Patrick's Day

The reverence that Catholics show to Saints is often misunderstood. The true role of the Saints in the Church is to inspire us to love and serve God. They show, by their good example, how to follow Jesus more closely. While all Christians are saints, all of us trying to follow God in our personal journeys, some do so in an exemplary way. It seems simple to me to recognize that if we honor those who excel in other areas, honoring those who live an exceptional Christian life is no different. We accept role models for sports, business, authors, etc. We give awards and accolades for many accomplishments. In this same, but perhaps more significant spirit, the Catholic Church honors those who exemplify the Christian life. Some move us more than others. The Saints come in every shape and color and can teach us. As a Catholic Christian, my own fondness for some Saints more than others is personal. The Saints have personalities unique to them and are no different than any of us, except in the firmness of their resolve to do good. I love them for their flaws and their successes because their humanity both comforts and inspires me.

My father's family was Irish. His grandfather immigrated to the United States from County Mayo in 1874 with his wife, and they raised a large family which included my own grandfather and many great aunts and uncles. My father had a strong connection with his Irish roots, and this was passed on to us. Included in this was an appreciation for St. Patrick. From the time I was in Jr. High School, I recall a small statue of St. Patrick in our living room where it was an important reminder of the Saint's positive influence on the Irish people.

I have this same statue now in our home, along with a small reproduction of an icon bearing the image of St. Patrick. I have tried to impress upon my children the value of our Irish roots.

For a brief history of St. Patrick himself, you can click on the image above or below.

For whatever it is worth, I personally have felt a closeness with the rural countryside of Ireland and have a temperament that can be described as Irish... friendly and fun loving while introverted and melancholy at the same time.

The prayer of St. Patrick, including "The Deer Cry" cited below, is a powerful acclamation of our intention to follow God each day, and to do so, strengthened by Him. So for the feast of St. Patrick, I share this prayer today:

"I arise today through a mighty strength, the invocation of the Trinity, through belief in the Threeness, through confession of the Oneness of the Creator of creation.

I arise today through the strength of Christ with his Baptism, through the strength of His Crucifixion with His Burial through the strength of His Resurrection with His Ascension, through the strength of His descent for the Judgment of Doom.

I arise today through the strength of the love of Cherubim in obedience of Angels, in the service of the Archangels, in hope of resurrection to meet with reward, in prayers of Patriarchs, in predictions of Prophets, in preachings of Apostles, in faiths of Confessors, in innocence of Holy Virgins, in deeds of righteous men.

I arise today, through the strength of Heaven; light of Sun, brilliance of Moon, splendor of Fire, speed of Lightning, swiftness of Wind, depth of Sea, stability of Earth, firmness of Rock.

I arise today, through God's strength to pilot me: God's might to uphold me, God's wisdom to guide me, God's eye to look before me, God's ear to hear me, God's word to speak for me, God's hand to guard me, God's way to lie before me, God's shield to protect me, God's host to secure me: against snares of devils, against temptations of vices, against inclinations of nature, against everyone who shall wish me ill, afar and anear, alone and in a crowd.

I summon today all these powers between me (and these evils): against every cruel and merciless power that may oppose my body and my soul, against incantations of false prophets, against black laws of heathenry, against false laws of heretics, against craft of idolatry, against spells of witches, smiths and wizards, against every knowledge that endangers man's body and soul. Christ to protect me today against poisoning, against burning, against drowning, against wounding, so that there may come abundance in reward.

Christ with me, Christ before me, Christ behind me, Christ in me, Christ beneath me, Christ above me, Christ on my right, Christ on my left, Christ in breadth, Christ in length, Christ in height, Christ in the heart of every man who thinks of me, Christ in the mouth of every man who speaks of me, Christ in every eye that sees me, Christ in every ear that hears me.

I arise today through a mighty strength, the invocation of the Trinity, through belief in the Threeness, through confession of the Oneness of the Creator of creation. Salvation is of the Lord. Salvation is of the Lord. Salvation is of Christ. May Thy Salvation, O Lord, be ever with us. Amen."

Mercy

I am not the best Christian.
I am not the best Catholic.
I am not the best wife.
I am not the wisest parent.
I am not the best mother.
I am not the smartest student.
I am not the coolest parent.
I am not the best photographer.
I am not the most insightful blogger.
I am not the best listener.
I am not the most eloquent speaker.
I am not the best writer.
I am not the best gardener.
I am not the best daughter.
I am not the best sister.
I am not the most patient person.
I am not the most learned theologian.
I am not the best intercessor.
I am not the kindest.
I am not the most helpful.
I am not the one who knows the most about anything.
I am not the one with all the answers.
I am not the most forgiving.
I am not the best dressed.
I am not the most beautiful.
I am not the youngest.
I am not the best housekeeper.
I am not the neatest person.
I am not the one with the most friends.
I am not the one with the most perfect children.
I am not the one with the most grandchildren.
I am not the best daughter-in-law.
I am not the best aunt.
I am not the best sister-in-law.
I am not the best niece.
I am not the best employee.
I am not the one with the most awards.
I am not the best athlete.
I am not the best singer.
I am not the best artist.
I am not the most creative.
I am not the best dog trainer.
I am not the best neighbor.
I am not the best cook.
I am not the most informed.
I am not the most politically involved.
I am not the best read.
I am not the most tidy.
I am not the most reliable.
I am not the most consistent.
I am not the most energetic.
I am not the most thorough.
There are so very very many things that I am not...
I am not the one sitting at His right hand.

I am aware of my mistakes, aware of my limitations, aware of the ways I have let others down.

I often hear my accuser remind me of all the ways that I am not worthy. I often hear my accuser's voice. My accuser often tells the truth. My accuser is often right about my failings. My accuser does not tell the whole truth, though. And the part he does not tell is the part I need most to hear.

I know:
I am a sinner.
I am very much in need of forgiveness.
I am very much in need of a Savior.
I am very much in need of the Eucharist.

This morning at Mass, once more, I was confronted with the truth. Jesus comes to me not because of myself but in spite of myself. He comes to me out of love. He comes to me always because He is merciful. I am very much forgiven. Without Him, I am nothing. I am a wilted flower. Nothing to behold. Nothing to recommend itself.

St. Theresa of Lisieux reminded us, "The guest of our soul knows our misery; He comes to find an empty tent within us - that is all He asks."

Unmerited Mercy. Grace. That is what I receive from Jesus. That is His gift to me.

I hope you experience it, too.

Rend Your Hearts, Not Your Garments, and Return to Me

Ash Wednesday marks the beginning of Lent today, Feb 17, 2010.

This is a flower pic, taken a couple years ago, which I've converted to this black and white image. Just as I have stripped away the color from this image, during this season of Lent, we now strip away ourselves to find more of the genuine, and less of the facades. We quiet those external noises that drown out the voice of our Creator. We gladly make sacrifices because we find our truer selves in so doing. And we turn our hearts toward God and others. This is the way we were meant to be. This is how we were designed.

We are not perfect, but there is beauty in our imperfection. We are not whole, but He can make up what is lacking.

Like the tulip above, we are open, and ready.

"Here I am, Lord. Your servant is listening."

As I woke today, I thought of St. Paul. He had many reasons to feel secure in his relationship with God. Born a Jew, circumcised on the eighth day, years of zealous (overzealous?) service within his tradition... But his worldly standing did not grant him access to the One he desired. All that effort to be good and holy... fell short. Paul tells us that knowing Jesus was worth more than all of his public position and standing. Paul's relationship with Jesus was the thing he valued most. St. Paul is a credible witness. Knowing all that he knows, he tells the Philippians (3:8-10), "I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them as refuse, in order that I may gain Christ...being found in him, not having a righteousness of my own, based on law, but that which is through faith in Christ...that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, that if possible, I may attain the resurrection form the dead."

We fast during Lent because it gives us great joy to be joined with Jesus in his own selflessness. While it may cause us temporary pain or difficulty, our eyes are looking toward the prize, the goal. That is, we are looking toward Jesus, himself. Our faith sustains us when He seems quiet. This is why, as Catholics, we are pleased to embrace small (or great) sufferings for we know that they are good teachers. We are not afraid of hardship. Our sacrifices teach us to be patient, and to wait in faith.

One more thing about St. Paul is that he leaves the outcome of his soul with Jesus. "...that if possible, I may attain the resurrection from the dead." He doesn't boast that it is his. If he boasts at all, he boasts only in his trust, in his relationship, in his faith in Jesus.

So many times it is difficult to trust. When He seems quiet, or we feel distant. That is when we must call on the virtue of patience, and rely on His timing. God is not a genie to be called forth from some shiny lamp. He is God. We must be his patient servants.

God bless any of you who stop to read these words. Those of you who observe Lent and those of you who do not. We are all His creatures.

Turning Back Toward God

I am giving some thought today to the weeks just ahead as many of us begin the period of Lent. Yesterday, I mentioned in my blog that if we are not thoughtful, we can easily drift from our chosen path and end up where we never intended to go. The antidote to this can be found, in part, in the observation of Lent.

Lent, the forty days prior to the Christian celebration of Easter, begins tomorrow. In many traditions, Lent is observed as a time to reflect on our need for salvation, our need for God, and to examine our lives in the context of virtue. Lent provides a time for self-reflection and repentance. As part of this "life review", it is customary to make small sacrifices, to demonstrate that we are serious about our desire to live more closely with God. Such acts, often of self-denial, can serve a dual purpose, for as we deny ourselves earthly comforts, we shut out the noise of the world. That "noise" often comes from within, as our inner selves make demands all day long: "Feed me!" or "Don't make me work so hard!" As we quiet those inner demands, we gain something scripture refers to as "self-mastery", which is a freedom that is often overlooked and undervalued by our Western culture. It is the freedom to say "no" to that often irrational and demanding voice that is inside us. Another part of this season of Lent includes reaching out, giving alms, and remembering others. Here we put into action our insights that it is better to give than to receive, better to think of others before thinking of ourselves.

The Christian life should be modeled after Jesus, himself. Therefore, we must concern ourselves to build a closer and stronger relationship with the Father, and also to love and help those He created.

This year, I think I will be considering Christian virtues.

What are virtues? In general, virtues involve a habitual and firm disposition to do good. They involve our intellect, and govern our actions, giving order to our passions and desires, and are informed by reason and faith. Virtues can be grouped around the 4 (four) cardinal virtues: prudence, justice, fortitude and temperance. The Catholic catechism tells us that there are 3 (three) theological virtues: faith, hope, and charity (love). These undergird and give direction to all other virtues.

The term human virtues, is used to describe qualities such as compassion, responsibility, a sense of duty, self-discipline, and restraint, honesty, loyalty, friendship, courage, and persistence, and others. These related to those Cardinal Virtues but they are supported by, or even driven by, the theological virtues of faith, hope and charity.

The theological virtues are acquired through baptism and granted to us by God's unmerited grace. But the cardinal virtues we acquire by doing good. We learn them through observing them in others, and repeating them in our own behavior. We grow in virtue by frequent repetition of virtuous acts. For example, each time we choose to tell the truth, rather than a lie, we grow in honesty. Each time we ignore our fears, we grow in courage.

There are many lists of virtues. Generosity, poverty of spirit (humility), purity of heart,... I will have much to think about!

The flower above is a yellow salsify. It grows wild in the midwest where I live. I have converted it to black and white. The stark tones seem appropriate for the journey ahead.

May He draw us always closer to His heart, and teach us to love as He does.

Think On These Things

"Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and seen in me, do, and the God of peace will be with you." Philippians 4:8-9

When I was in high school and college I spent a good deal of time reading and praying about lessons from the Old and New Testaments. St. Paul's exhortation to the Philippians, noted above, has always held deep meaning for me. It teaches the way to a) maintain a positive attitude, b) is excellent advice for warding off depression, and c) is a wonderful first step for problem solving when one is confronted with problems.

This has all come to mind again recently as I have watched television take on darker and darker themes. There seems to be a marked increase in shows that deal with a non-Christian view of spirituality-- shows that elevate magic, and the afterlife or vampires, which, of course are very popular these days. There are increasingly gruesome crime scenes and an exploration into the psyche of those who torture or perform unthinkable acts on others. On a certain level it is fascinating. I admit that I am drawn to many of the shows that deal with crime. On the simplest level, they are about good and evil. Mixed in to even the best shows, however, are the little jabs against my beliefs.

There is very little to watch that inspires one to be a better person, but there is plenty to normalize our baser instincts. There are few times when Catholic virtues are supported, and many more times when their ideal is actually mocked. It's funny, too, because really, the argument against Catholic ideals doesn't have much to support it. Mocking virtue and idealizing vice hardly holds up to real scrutiny. But isn't that the idea? In a way, aren't we just being numbed or lulled into a torpor so we won't scrutinize. Taking the path of least resistance, we can drift further from our truest selves, further from our real capacities. It's like Western culture has become so adolescent that we stand as a group and laugh at things we don't even understand, but act in front of one another as though we have superiority. Western culture thinks it is pretty "cool".

We know better. What good parent doesn't hold up some sort of ideal for their children? Who wouldn't encourage their child to improve their soccer or reading skills, or to practice their violin? We know it takes effort to meet our goals. So maybe the problem is that we have lost sight of our spiritual and moral goals. Maybe the problem is that we have replaced the real and authentic, with something that is not real but counterfeit.

There is a story, and I don't know the source or I would give it. But it is the story of someone who works in the banking industry. He or she is an expert at identifying counterfeit bills. This individual was asked one time about how he got so good at identifying counterfeit bills, and if he didn't have to see a lot of counterfeit money as part of his education. His reply was that he didn't need to study the counterfeits. He studied the genuine bill. That is all he did. If you study and know the genuine, you can spot a counterfeit.

So this is the point I am making. If we submerge ourselves in what is base, we are likely to lose sight of the virtues and our moral compass may drift, over time, leading us down a path that we never really intended to travel. This doesn't happen because we are bad, but because we are human. We are easily influenced by what we hear and see, and if we are not paying attention, we may forget ourselves.

So St. Paul's words speak to me. And that is why I post this photo of the gladiolus. It is not the best picture of a flower that you will ever see. But it is good enough. And I hope it points you to consider something good, and true and beautiful.

As we approach Lent this coming Wednesday, may we all turn our hearts back to the One who made them. May we take each other's hands to guide us all back to the path if we have strayed. Our happiness truly comes from Him.

Peace to you, my friend.

Happy Father's Day, Dad

My dad bought me my first camera when I was in 3rd grade or so. He let me shoot pictures (B&W) and took the film in to be developed once per week for me. He seemed to notice the things I liked, and encouraged them (most of them...). He even seemed to share many of them. He passed on his Catholic faith, his love for dogs, nature and the out of doors. He pointed out things like constellations in the sky, and deer tracks in our yard. He taught us the importance of accepting responsibility and for making our own choices. He taught us to make the changes we wanted to see. He liked to know things, liked to know about the things in the natural world.

He's been gone since 1990, a long time, really. A daughter never outgrows her need for a father. Thanks, Dad.

(The above composite is generated by Flickr's Explore criteria. A mystery in itself. These pics of mine are, at the time of this writing, currently in Explore, which means they generated enough interest on their own merits or some strange fluke of the Explore "magic" to be deemed in the top 500 most interesting pics uploaded on the days that they were originally posted. If anyone cares.)

1. Front view of Tabernacle, 2. Reindeer Seamus 12'03, 3. Colored windows, 4. Always take time to pray., 5. Yellow Cattleya Orchid, 6. Seamus Dines, 7. Framed!!, 8. To see as the giraffe sees!,

9. Baptismal Font Reflection, 10. Back view of Tabernacle, 11. Suspended!, 12. Early Morning Walk, 13. Autumn: Fading Light, 14. Our Mother, 15. Stained glass depiction of St. Therese of Lisieux, 16. Katherine and me,

17. He is always listening., 18. Ready for Rain, 19. Come closer!

Created with fd's Flickr Toys.

Immaculate Conception (December 8)

In honor of the Feast of the Immaculate Conception of Mary.

"The hope of new life began the very same moment that Our Lady was conceived in the fullness of grace without the slightest disfigurement of original sin."
- from Conversation with God, by Francis Fernandez

"Our Lady is rest for those who work, consolation for those who mourn, and relief for those who are sick. She is a refuge for those caught in the storms of life, a fountain of compassion for sinners, a sweet relief for the sorrowful and a sure source of aid for those who pray."
- St. John Damascene, from "Homily on Our Lady's Dormition"

(page 345 Conversations with God, Vol 7)

Mary, conceived without sin, Pray for us who have recourse to thee.

Judge Wisely

Yesterday was the second Sunday of Advent. The Communion Prayer has jumped out at me in years past, and this year, there was the same, sage entreaty: "Teach us to judge wisely the things of earth, and to love the things of Heaven."

That just about sums it up, doesn't it? If we can just sort out the value of earthly things, and place our emphasis and efforts on obtaining the Heavenly ones we'd be ahead of the game. The pursuit of Virtue, versus the pursuit of things... Investing in people rather than in accumulating wealth. Challenging considerations. No wonder we ask the Father for help in discerning what has value.

Hidden Mysteries

Some reflections today about Easter and the Ressurection... At Easter we celebrate Jesus' victory over sin and death. I personally have always found the transition from contemplating the cross to celebrating the Ressurection more difficult. It seems to me, though, upon some reflection, that one of the most important lessons of Easter, is this: We only achieve the power of the Ressurection by embracing the mysteries of the Cross. There is no ressurection without the cross. By accepting, by embracing the cross, we conform more perfectly to Jesus' example of embracing the Father's will completely, and the true power of the Christian life can be realized. Some form of suffering is intrinsic to the Christian walk. The disciple is not greater than his Master. Part of our freedom as Christians is having the freedom to choose the way that He walked, the way of love. Suffering comes in many forms; one needn't create opportunities. If we practice the virtues, if we practice love, we will have ample opportunity to choose others over ourselves, and this is always good for the soul. For true love requires that one suffer for the sake of the one they love. It is the Pascal Mystery.

There are hidden realities that can't be seen with the unaided eye. Details of the flower that are usually invisible to me can be seen with a macro lens, opening up a world of surprise. A microscope can show us bacteria or cellular variations that we otherwise would not know existed. So too, prayer opens our eyes to spiritual realities that remain hidden if we do not exercise our spiritual senses and improve our acuity for things other-worldly. Lent offered us opportunities to see with our spiritual senses. Let's not walk away unchanged, but bring those insights with us to assist us on the road ahead.

I walked through an old cemetery this afternoon, reading names on the tombstones and reflecting on those people who have lived before me. Most of those I saw died in the mid 1800s. Considering their lives and the world in which they lived, I was struck by the hardships and frequent losses they endured. Infants and small children, young men and women of 18 were buried in this small church cemetery along with just a few who lived to be in their 50s or later. On so many of the tombstones were professions of faith, statements of their belief in the ressurection, and the eternal nature of our lives. If we stop and don't see past the deaths, we will miss the very important truth of the Ressurection. But we can't skip ahead to the Ressurection without really understanding the Cross, either...

The Ressurection is a reality which we will all know one day. To achieve it, one must accept the suffering that is inherent in this world, and live with our eyes fixed on the Kingdom which is to come.

I wish you Easter joy, and Life in His Name.

Bereft

The tabernacle in the Catholic Church remains empty from the end of Holy Thursday's Mass until Easter. There is nothing to describe the loss I feel when I see the empty tabernacle in the church. I am separated from my Lord by the death He accepted on my account.

He is not there. Not physically.

On Good Friday, we are witnesses to the ultimate sacrifice that has changed the world.

"...the Lord was pleased to crush him in infirmity... through his suffering, my servant shall justify many, and their guilt he shall bear... he surrendered himself to death and was counted among the wicked; and he shall take away the sins of many, and win pardon for their offenses." -Isaiah 53:10, 11, 12